with running is what I seem to have developed since August. I don't know why I started running, I just did. And I don't like it. But what I do like... is the results. And how it makes me feel. And the fact that I actually like myself more then I did. Let's face it, we women are evil to ourselves! We are our own worse critics, and we pick ourselves apart and are brutal on every "flaw" that we can come up with (and some that we don't have but think we do).
I started running in August because I was tired of being unhappy with my body and decided that I couldn't stand another moment whining about it. However, I have to say that in August, I didn't think I was fat. Nobody told me I was fat. Well, except... OK, so one person said I needed to lose a few pounds but really, do we ever listen to our moms? And my husband certainly wasn't complaining. After all, I had spent all summer P90xing and so I knew I wasn't fat.
But in August, my knee decided it no longer liked P90x and so I had to hit the treadmill while rehabbing the knee. And so I decided if I was going to hamstermill it, I would make it work to my advantage - on a 10 incline at 3.5 and before I knew it, I was walking at 4.0, and then running at 5.5 and then a 6.0.
Then, a person I know decided to do a half marathon and I was inspired. Random but inspired. And so I decided, I can do that. So I researched, studied and decided on a training program. And I made huge major changes to my diet (not really). I just cut out gluten, white food, unnatural sugars, processed foods and bread. So what do I eat? Ahh, that's another night and another post.
Long Story short, I have become obsessed with training and nutrition again (I go through these phases) and I enjoy it. Finally, a great way for my OCD to manifest itself. I'm up to 9 miles on my long runs, and my short runs are between 3 and 5 miles. I run 6 days a week. I run on the treadmill most days as it allows my ADHD to be fed by the remote control of the TV. And on weekends, I run with my beloved who is my biggest cheerleader.
I realize I must have been fat in August though. I made this realization when people who had not seen me for a few weeks said "OMG, you have lost soooooooo much weight". And then I realize I did - 35 lbs (28.5% weight loss). So that's some of the story. I still look at pictures (like the one taken at the zoo about 4 days ago) and still think I'm fat, but I'm going to work on that(but I'm a woman and I think my brain is simply hardwired that way).
I hate running but I love the fact that none of my shorts fit the other day, none of my bathing suits fit anymore, and none of my blue jeans fit. I know - no sympathy. I'm not bragging - I'm just saying that is the only love part to the running relationship.
My husband told his friend (he has more than one, but he was just talking to one) the other day, that he hates running but because I love it so much, he loves running with me. I corrected him and said - I hate running but I love what happens afterwards. So now, we hate running together. And the side benefit, totally unexpected, is that on Saturdays when we do our long run - it's up to 1 1/2 hours of just we time. Him, Me and Him encouraging me the whole way. Okay - I absolutely Love that part!
